What does the cat purr in your ear?

 

 

Roommates and Lovers

 

 

 

 ‘The snowman couldn’t say ‘No’,

Probably he was too shy,

The best reason to be romantic,

It always great to know,

That somewhere someone loves you tonight,

I felt someone was pulling my arm,

An invisible man or my savior’s spirit,

I looked around,

And saw no one,

But someone continued pushing me down,

He joggled me like a key in the lock,

Making a full-out effort,

I strived to grab a ghostly arm,

The invisible man escaped like a second,

I came to my senses,

As if I woke up,

She was pulling my arm,

Trembling with cold,

‘Baby, let’s go,

I’m going blue,

It’s almost dawn,

Freezing to death and old’,

My Dalai Lama was running away,

Sometimes we have to part,

I shrugged and we walked,

‘I have just crossed some sort of border’,

It turned out to be very easy,

I crossed the beginning of our end,

We all have the same reason,

To feel romantic from time to time,

We stroke up an acquaintance,

Ancient at first sight business,

It didn’t involve philosophical readings,

 We had our own Immanuel Kant,

I  proposed or better faltered,

‘How about my place’,

 She put any doubt on hold,

She secretly held it,

She stopped rummaging through her purse,

Looking for keys to my heart,

He had the key to my space,

Sooner than later we moved in together,

 We didn’t share like all people did,

Sooner or later we’d have been their copies,

Mass- hatched  in  incubators,

 Happily living in  brooders,

Under a handmade banner,

 ‘Live normal life before you leave,

Our ways were abnormal,

The way we looked at each other,

The way we looked  at the world,

We had our way to burn,

The candle of dolce vita,

Till that night,

We had been two lovers,

In lilac twilight,

We became two roommates,

 When we played  kids,

We were two lovers,

When we grew up,

We were two roommates,

Quickly again we returned to being little,

That shared the same bathroom,

In rush hour of afternoon tales’.

What does the cat purr in your ear?

Dedicated to enormously spacious and  endless men. I only try to describe the subconscious state during transition to commitment. I don’t mean agreements. For me there is no other commitment except for a mental one.

 

 

Lilac Twilight

 

 

 

‘The stubborn mongrel confused me,

I took a timid  step,

Forward and nowhere,

I was badly  worn out,

My heart became a racing rat,

My chest started aching,

 As if it was covered with wounds,

As if it was mercilessly trodden,

Under foot of a wild Arabian horse,

Clattering hoofs demanded attention,

Tribes of women were walking on stilts,

They fought to be destined for passion,

 ‘He is a wonder man’,

They loved to believe,

But I was a trapped beast,

They smiled glimpsing at diamonds,

They took pride in well-done manicure,

They fought to be destined for stardom,

Oxygen declared war,

Oxygen versus blood,

In this battle I was collateral loss,

I didn’t look for cure,

I bled in the hive of golden locks,

My miracle was  somewhere near,

There was only forever,

If I had missed  this step,

It would have gone,

I’d have been lost,

My imagination was scared,

Something terrible would take place,

Electroshock or blizzard,

A tornado would  hit fairy tales,

The dog’s  tongue was stuck out,

 Confirming  my terrible thoughts,

 I wasn’t wrong for sure,

In spite of it I crossed,

I crossed  the border,

And nothing happened,

Though I wished for the end,

I froze and froze,

My skin was crawling,

 I was an  icy sculpture,

Nothing happened,

It was silly to be afraid,

I was floating in the passage,

I was anxious and very calm,

I was strongly addicted to purple,

As I had never been,

In my irrational life,

It was flickering  misty glow,

Among no one else,

Here everything moved slow,

I found myself  in lilac twilight,

I found myself in the nearest past,

A playground crusade seemed to be over,

The last   caress touched his cheek,

His hat was worn to one side,

It looked out to stormy water,

It was the wrong bedside,

She put the rouge in her pocket,

She rummaged through her purse,

She found  a wish,

It was well-bred and perfect,

Shyness was not her forte,

‘Every time you go out,

Be irresistibly cute,

Love is a merciless fire,

Don’t mess with it,

It will melt you for good’.

What does the cat purr in your ear?

 

 

She Never Had Dreams

 

‘She threatened and started running,

Toward a play park not intending to play,

Introducing herself to a shy snowman,

He couldn’t say ‘No’,

She kissed him on the icy cheek,

Always she did what she felt,

She never had a plan,

Strangers thought it was her mistake,

I think it was her secret,

She never had a plan,

She had a bloodthirsty instinct,

It’s hard to say what I felt,

I wasn’t myself for sure,

I had nothing to do,

I had nothing to tell,

Despite my anxiety growing up,

Ringing a danger bell,

I couldn’t ignore her heads-up,

I couldn’t ignore her being hasty and cruel,

Her persuasion did not miss the target,

The target was my heart,

The point was I had to choose,

It made me feel sorry and sad for a moment,

Choosing we always lose something,

Any choice means loss,

I was striving to make a decision,

She was too absorbed to see,

She was performing a smilelift,

Looking for warmth in jelly substance,

Making everyone happy and wet,

Might have been her new project,

Or she was thirsty for joy,

Following her make-beliefs,

I looked around,

I saw only ghosts,

In a hurry they passed by me,

They crossed the line with no fear,

They didn’t know borders,

I didn’t find it weird,

They came from another scene,

A couple of times they pushed me,

They felt ashamed,

I hope they did,

They muttered  ghostly something,

Galactic apologies or maybe curses,

I looked like a fool to them,

I saw a dog coming my way,

Red haired and dirty,

With intelligent eyes,

‘Come here! Look! Bright streak of light!

Let’s visit the other side’,

 The mongrel answered nothing,

It understood my angst,

Now it was my Dalai Lama,

Staring at light,

It understood my dilemma,

It stopped wagging its tail,

‘What are you waiting?

 Go!’

Sad bastard’s eyes said,

‘You see,

I like you a lot,

I’d love to be your favorite puppy,

I’ve been to the other side,

 I am afraid,

I can not,

My dancing tail never says ‘Sorry’.

What does the cat purr in your ear?

 

 

“The Brightest Light Cast The Darkest Shadow”

 

 

 

‘It’s how we left together,

It’s how we left this place,

That night we really did it,

Being mutually heartfelt,

Being mutually obsessed,

For the first time we left their world,

It occurred to be very easy,

Complications are only in our heads,

Their world wasn’t huge at all,

 It was neither big nor bigger,

Their world was much smaller than our loss,

Its starchy faces were thoroughly ironed,

It was smaller than a cut on an innocent throat,

Committing suicide incest,

It was overcrowded with silly masks,

They dreamt about what they could be,

They were only a midsize script,

They would never become a movie,

Loving and living together very quickly we realized,

That after we found each other,

All throats looked quite the same,

They didn’t differ,

In our loving arms,

It was spring in February air,

Winter night was surprisingly soft,

Everything felt unreal,

I surrendered to make-beliefs,

I knew that nothing was over,

Winter would strike again,

With thrusts of cold and snow,

Improving its jelly complexion,

Shooting up cruelty in Arctic veins,

We walked down the street,

What a fantastic show!

Out of sudden I saw,

A ray of the brightest light,

It drew a long line in front of us,

Cutting everything into halves,

The boarder between two parallel worlds,

It lay on the black snow,

It broke through buildings, wires and lamps,

Like a mystical light sword,

It took one second,

Then it took her,

She jumped over something,

She thought to be slush,

 Or photogenic dirt,

She whispered to me ‘Cross the border’,

I let go of her hand,

I didn’t remember how,

She moved back like a crawfish,

Nothing happened,

In the fast-flowing parallel world,

She encouraged me saying,

‘Do it or go,

Winter is like your heart,

It’s hard and rough and deadly frozen,

Sometimes on spring occasions it melts,

I feel your anxiety grows’,

She waved her hand and warned me,

What was coming next,

 I knew,

‘You think too much,

The ice bridge will start melting,

You have to hurry,

Maybe you are loved up?

 

It's me,

 

I  love you,

Or you will stay forever,

On the side of a happy family set,

It’s my last invitation or go,

It’s the last time I say ‘Hurry up’.

What does the cat purr in your ear?

 

 

White Intentions

 

 

‘By the way,

I’ve never told you,

The window glass was cold to the touch.

I have well outlined intentions,

Unlike my flowery sheets,

My intentions are crispy and white’.

I said her ‘Let’s go’,

She said ‘My place or your place,

I promise you good night snow,

And volumes of my incense,

It’s all that I’ve ever had,

It’s all that I will bequeath,

Abandoning your chest,

When you can’t decide to stay or to go,

I will always find something to tell,

A gravitation love story,

Between a star and a hedgehog,

Because big love never ends’,

She looked out the window,

‘What do you see?’ I asked,

‘The moon and a shining star,

It’s been such a long haul,

Everyone has been sleeping,

Since day started resembling night’,

‘I’m asking about creatures,

Werewolves, stalkers and vamps’,

‘We can easily disappear,

No one is watching us’,

‘Let’s leave the opium digs,

The maroon velvet room,

It has no corners,

Butterflies stay at the premises’,

‘Deal’,

‘They are still grow and learn,

Using props and seduction tricks,

In the warmth of a plush womb,

We both are wrongdoers’,

She promised,

I would be abused,

Every abuse would be lovely,

She was upset by who she was not,

As if it was so important,

Her logic made everyone angry,

 ‘If I were Marilyn Monroe,

She is too dead to be true,

Lana Del Rey is better,

Every birthday I’d sing,

 Happy Birthday to you,

Because I’m not Monroe,

Lana is still unborn,

You are not Mister President,

Sorry,

Something is terribly wrong with your world’,

‘Something is terribly wrong with your head,

It’s the syllogism of paranoia,

You sky scrap them all,

Corrupting your thoughts,

It’s like the place you work,

‘I quit every night’,

‘Sorry’,

 ‘Maniacs and paranoids are people,

That follow any  –ism.

I don’t follow strangers’ dreams,

And promises that are liquid,

I follow your yes,

And my thoughtless,  

It says a lot of ‘he seems’,

My dreams are suggested by you,

Your voice is very suggestive’.