What does the cat purr in your ear?

Dedicated to enormously spacious and  endless men. I only try to describe the subconscious state during transition to commitment. I don’t mean agreements. For me there is no other commitment except for a mental one.

 

 

Lilac Twilight

 

 

 

‘The stubborn mongrel confused me,

I took a timid  step,

Forward and nowhere,

I was badly  worn out,

My heart became a racing rat,

My chest started aching,

 As if it was covered with wounds,

As if it was mercilessly trodden,

Under foot of a wild Arabian horse,

Clattering hoofs demanded attention,

Tribes of women were walking on stilts,

They fought to be destined for passion,

 ‘He is a wonder man’,

They loved to believe,

But I was a trapped beast,

They smiled glimpsing at diamonds,

They took pride in well-done manicure,

They fought to be destined for stardom,

Oxygen declared war,

Oxygen versus blood,

In this battle I was collateral loss,

I didn’t look for cure,

I bled in the hive of golden locks,

My miracle was  somewhere near,

There was only forever,

If I had missed  this step,

It would have gone,

I’d have been lost,

My imagination was scared,

Something terrible would take place,

Electroshock or blizzard,

A tornado would  hit fairy tales,

The dog’s  tongue was stuck out,

 Confirming  my terrible thoughts,

 I wasn’t wrong for sure,

In spite of it I crossed,

I crossed  the border,

And nothing happened,

Though I wished for the end,

I froze and froze,

My skin was crawling,

 I was an  icy sculpture,

Nothing happened,

It was silly to be afraid,

I was floating in the passage,

I was anxious and very calm,

I was strongly addicted to purple,

As I had never been,

In my irrational life,

It was flickering  misty glow,

Among no one else,

Here everything moved slow,

I found myself  in lilac twilight,

I found myself in the nearest past,

A playground crusade seemed to be over,

The last   caress touched his cheek,

His hat was worn to one side,

It looked out to stormy water,

It was the wrong bedside,

She put the rouge in her pocket,

She rummaged through her purse,

She found  a wish,

It was well-bred and perfect,

Shyness was not her forte,

‘Every time you go out,

Be irresistibly cute,

Love is a merciless fire,

Don’t mess with it,

It will melt you for good’.